So what is self help and how can it help YOU to improve yourself and your life? Lets discover self help and how it helps you.
Table of Contents
From the Merriam-Webster dictionary:
Definition of self-help
- the action or process of bettering oneself or overcoming one’s problems without the aid of others
- especially : the coping with one’s personal or emotional problems without professional help
Self-help is usually defined as the action of improving oneself without the help from others. But I don’t think that is really true, well not nowadays at least. Now we attend lectures and workshops, take part in courses and read endless books
Often, people look to self-help books to get a clear perspective about life when things get too hard.
Some people believe that self-help doesn’t actually work because many people have reported that it doesn’t provide them with lasting change. However, there are multiple scenarios in which self-help has worked and when it can benefit you the most.
When Self-Help Works
People often attempt self-help when trying to be more productive with their work and everyday life. These people can then focus on goal setting, time management and prioritising. Rather than getting help from a “professional,” it’s common for people to help themselves when wanting to become more productive. They know deep down what they are doing wrong that is preventing them from being productive, so it only makes sense that they are the ones to help themselves.
Self-help helps people gain that momentum back when they have lost sight of their goals or never even had the inspiration in life to do great things. Once again, you know yourself best, so you have the greatest idea of where you lost inspiration and why you lost it. Asking yourself these questions has often been key in finding or even discovering and getting that inspiration back into your life.
Why would I need Self Help or Personal Development?
I would say it’s mainly because we are bombarded with negativity from the time we are small and continues into adulthood. From newspapers, magazines, television, the internet, adverts on buildings etc. 
All telling us the way we should live and where, what to wear, what size to be, where to work, go on holiday and endlessly on and on. Why? Because according to them its the only way to be happy!
I say it is all absolute rubbish!! You can live in a shed with rags for clothes and be happy. Are you horrified by that statement?
It is true though. You do not need anything outside of yourself to be happy. Another person cannot make you happy. The same with self worth. You are ENOUGH. Complete in yourself, you just need some help to remember and believe that and that’s where Self Help or Personal Development come in.
How to Get the Most out of Self-Help
Despite what so many people say, self-help works for many!
Here are some tips to getting the most out of self-help.
1. Most people have the skill if they are tapped into themselves IE: use their intuition, to improve their lives on their own.
2. So much can be gained through determination, hard work, independence and keeping an open mind.
3. Learning new concepts and techniques can help people develop skills which they can then benefit from in all areas of life.
4. Anything that provides a person with motivation and inspiration can help someone make positive changes in their life.
5. You need to check out courses or workshops by doing some research before handing over your hard earned money. Read the first few pages of a book offline and online or see if its available at a library to see if it resonates. Check out courses before jumping in and do some research.
Not everything suits everybody because we are all different.
Limitations with Self-Help
It’s important that you know sometimes there are situations in life where self-help won’t work, as it cannot help with everything. In many situations, self-help can only get you so far. There will also be points along your journey where you will feel the need for more help than you have required up to that point.
1. There aren’t any “magic formulas” for success, meaning that there isn’t always one specific answer. Everyone is different and what works well for one person could do nothing for another.
2. Getting help from mentors and important people in your life isn’t a bad thing, as they can add in a perspective you didn’t originally have.
3. It’s important to know that any issues with addiction, anxiety, and depression cannot be “cured” by yourself.
4. A lot of the self-help material out there for you is mainly about the hype and not the substance that actually helps. Not all of it provides transformational value. Always go with your intuition after doing research.
5. It will take time to notice changes, it won’t be something that happens overnight or even in a few weeks.
Does it work
Many have proven that self-help truly does work. Different people have different techniques than others do to achieve that sense of achievement by way of independence.
It’s key that you figure out how to help yourself, because even if you don’t get what you wanted to out of self-help, you’ve gained a skill that’s important to have in this society: independence. Getting help from yourself is eye opening and provides you with so many benefits, including motivation and inspiration.
It also gives that all important confidence as you come to realise that you are as important as anyone else. That you are a completely unique individual and perfect exactly as you are.
A pet phrase of mine, coined many years ago is: “You are perfect in your own unique way”. Carry that with you always and know it is true.
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Questions and comments welcome.
In life, the sooner we all realise that we ourselves matter, from that point we will be good and feel much better. It will also help us have a better relationship with other people as well.
Most times we make people feel bad because we do not have the love in us and the only thing that we have to give is sadness. Loving yourself will help you be a better person in many ways.
That’s very true Justin. We cannot love or help others when we cannot feel it ourselves.
We need to learn to love and care enough for our selves to be happy and be able to an amazing life where love flows from us to others.
Thank you for commenting.
Having learnt about self love and self gratification, it is inevitable that I don’t want to add this one to the array of selfs that I already know. I think self help is very powerful and we should learn to satisfy ourselves without needing yhe help of ofthers to do that. I am very happy you have us an insight on how slef help can help us.
Glad you found the post useful Suz.
Self love is a good thing, too many people don’t even like themselves.
Being able to like and love yourself for who you are is wonderful. We too often talk negatively to ourselves and are kinder to others than ourselves. Now we are learning that other’s opinions aren’t important, it’s what we think of ourselves that matters.
It’s an important step in self development.
Hey
Thank you for this article, it was a sweet reminder that i don’t need anything outside myself to be happy and tha it is my responsibility to prioritize my own happiness. I am am a firm believer in self help, it has worked for me many times. What I can say is that it needs commitment to self and consistency.But it should never replace the role of mentors and coaches. They are both equally important.
Glad you enjoyed the post. Many never realise that it is there and has always been accessible all along, so you are way ahead in that.
I too have been using it for many years, it is an excellent tool to keep us moving forward in life. It does take commitment to your own growth to keep moving forwards, perseverance and persistence are key as is being consistent.
I agree, mentors and coaches can also help us move forwards in leaps and bounds. Often being outside and looking in means they can see more clearly, the way forward.
Thank you for reading and commenting.